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I’ve had an interesting insight today. And it’s funny that this just became clear to me now because I’ve been studying communication for several years.  A friend recently told me she felt like I was talking down to her. When I recall the conversation I had wanted to bring her attention to the fact that she was sabotaging her own health by certain actions she was taking.  When I think about that conversation now I realize that I was completely annoyed with her lack of commitment to her own body and health and it’s the annoyance that came out in what I was saying and not my concern for her health.  I’m sure if I had had that concern and compassion utmost in my consciousness while I held this conversation my communication would have been understood differently.

Communication is made up of 55% body language or sensory acuity, 38% tone of voice and only 7% words spoken.  Which means that what we say makes up a very small part of what is taken in by the other person. So when I was speaking to her and voicing my ideas about health my body language and tone was saying “I’m annoyed with what I perceive to be a lack of commitment on your part,” and she picked up on that 93% and not on my words (the 7%).

Now being aware of it consciously I can make sure that what I’m communicating has the intention that I want behind it. When I set the intention behind my communication to be compassion, love, and respect for the other person then my body language, my tone, and my words will align with that and the message will be clearer.

I’m grateful for this situation that occurred because it led me to this place that I am today.  My friend and I have talked it over too and all’s well.
What intent do you set for all your communications

My favourite musician of all time came to Vancouver for a show recently and I managed to get a ticket and saw him perform. It was a sold out performance.  He’s not a big frills and gimmicks type of entertainer. He puts on a great show with his music. This time the concert was at the Orpheum Theatre instead of at GM Place (which is a hockey arena).  Needless to say, the acoustics were incredible and the entire show was just Bryan and his guitar and the occasional piano accompaniment.  He filled that room with incredible sound!

I know I’m biased because I love his music, but to me anyone who can perform live and sound good is talented.  Bryan Adams is a talented lyricist and his music appeals to all age groups. His music holds a special place in my heart because when times were rough for me his music was the one constant and good thing I had. I could always count on it to be there for me.

It seems almost silly to me now to fall back on music to be the one good thing in my life. Now that I am in the place I want to be and I’m moving forward, but a few years ago it was sometimes the only thing that I had to hold on to.  It’s better than drugs or alcohol, that’s for sure. From the fresh perspective that I have now, anything which is not destructive towards the self or others is a good thing.  Sometimes it’s all that will get you through another day, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

I am so grateful that I got to experience that show because Bryan Adams is one of the most inspirational people in my life.

I’m very excited because my first Fresh Perspective newsletter is due to come out on August 1st and I’m working on it every day a little bit. The best part is that the closer the deadline comes the more resources I find to help me. I am confident now that it will be a great newsletter and will bring value to those who read it.

That’s my vision for my life now: giving value to others. And doing this without loosing sight of myself. It’s also my business philosophy. 

Wayne Dyer says that all we can really do with our lives is give it away. It took me a long time to get what he meant and when it finally sunk in it was a very profound moment in my life. Now my work centers around empowering others to “get it” starting with being able to help themselves become congruent.  I really hve the best job in the world!

We had a wonderful camping trip at Birch Bay State Park.  The campground is situated right on the beach and that’s where we spent most of Saturday.  The weather was fantastic. Our kids loved riding their bikes and exploring the forest with their friends. 

When just the 4 of us go camping we keep everything pretty simple. This includes meals and activities.  The family that came with us introduced us to some gourmet camping!  Complete with appetizers before every meal and a craft table for the kids.  It was so much fun to experience something different and spend time with friends who respect each other, their children, and the people they interact with.

It was truly a relaxing 3 days and I felt as though my weekend had been a couple weeks long! It really reinforced the benefits of surrounding ourselves with people who embrace life and to reduce the number of “toxic” and negative people. We’ve vacationed with folks with such attitudes before and it is stressful.  I know our camping trip would have been less enjoyable if we had to listen to complaining and bickering rather than fun conversation and laughter.

Our next trip is coming up this weekend and we’ll see what the weather does.  We’re all hoping for sun and heat.

I love this verse from the Tao Te Ching

“Serve the needs of others and all your own needs will be fulfilled. Through selfless action, fulfillment is attained.”

I never truly understood what this meant until recently. I was at a seminar and one of the trainers from the Empowerment Partnership was speaking about their business philosophy.  She said that they literally train their competition by teaching their students all they know and then allowing the students to purchase all the materials and products necessary to begin training others. They provide lifetime support to their students and don’t expect any further payment once the tuition is paid.  The tuition costs of all the training and products are negligible compared to the value that you get out of the knowledge for the rest of your life.

This struck me very deeply and I asked why they have this philosophy.  The answer I received was that they want to empower as many people as possible in the world.  Such a simple philosophy, almost too simple that you’d think there was some catch. And that question was asked too. But there is no catch.  It’s about making the world a better place. Period.

The lesson I got from this is that anyone who provides a product or service should absolutely charge what they are worth and also give everything they know on that subject away. Do everything in their power to help the people they are serving. And through this they will prosper. Through this all their needs will be met. 

This lesson extends to everything in life. Every interaction we have with others and even with ourselves. It’s a lesson that I have taken to heart and it’s a philosophy that I now practice in my life.

I’m heading off to Seattle tomorrow to attend another training and I’m excited beyond belief.  I am a bit nervous too, though, becuase I won’t see my family for a whole week.  I tend to get very homesick.  What’s keeping me excited about this is the fact that I’m doing what I love. I am living my calling and furthering myself and this is ultimately for the good of our family.  I know that my kids will be safe and well taken care of and I have nothing to worry about. I am so blessed to have a wonderful family that stands behind me and celebrates in my successes.

I’ve been in a bit of a funk the last little while. I’ve been feeling like I have nothing to say and it shows because I haven’t blogged in over a week.  I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching and research on myself to determine exactly what has gotten me into this state.

Well, I uncovered some interesting things that I can now release and get back to my usual positive state.  It amazes me that even though I’ve been releasing negative emotions and limiting beliefs for so long now my mind keeps digging more of them up.  I guess it comes from years of having negative emotions and limiting beliefs build up. 

The most amazing experience for me is that when I search for what I need to move my life or my business forward I always find it now. It’s something that I expect to show up for me each time and it does!  And I’m not being cocky here. I’ve just stopped labeling these things showing up as coincidences.  When I am ready to receive information and learn something the teachers are there. They are there for me in the form of articles, emails, conversations, books, and countless other ways.

What I love about my life now is that I am open minded enough to receive these learnings.  They allow me to live my calling and reach every dream that I have for myself and my family. Funk begone!

Eternal Meditation

Close your eyes,
Release your mind,
Invite your imagination,
And experience serenity.

Open your heart,
Reveal your love,
Welcome your Spirit,
And feel tranquility.

Float your thoughts,
Suspend your reality,
Enter your universe,
And become eternity.

Were you told as a child “don’t be selfish?” I was. And I was told this often enough that I internalized that word to mean bad things.  And it can be bad if you make it. If you live your life in a way that puts you on top at the expense of others you are definitely living the bad side of selfish.

It’s important to be the good side of selfish, especially for women.  The first part of the word has SELF in it.  And you want to take care of yourself, don’t you?  That seems to be the first place women fall short. They are so busy taking care of their families, their careers, their households that their endless to do list often does not include themselves.

Being there for others is how many of us find fulfillment in life. It’s important to be kind and helpful and to nurture our famailies.  But I have come to believe that you have to also put yourself on your own to do list. When you give of yourself to the point when there is nothing left you will burn out and resent your responsibilities.    Is that the state of mind you want to end up in?

Take the time every day to do at least 5 things that are very important to you as a person.  They could be as simple as drinking 8 glasses of water or having a shower or your favourite cup of tea.  Take the time for yourself to recharge your batteries and begin to see a difference in your thoughts and feelings. Know that you are the most important person to yourself.

I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase “what you think about expands” or “you are what you think.” Your unconscious mind cannot process negatives and this means that if someone says to you don’t think of a blue elephant your mind will thing of it before it can not think of it.

Knowing that your thoughts are energy that vibrates differently if it’s positive or negative is a powerful clue to why you may not be living the life you want. If all you think about is what you don’t want or how bad it is or how much you don’t like something, that’s what your mind is focusing on and those are the vibrations you’re putting out. if all that you want is the opposite of what you’re thinking about constantly then it’s vibrating at a different level of energy.

The conscious choice of thoughts is truly the only way to change the direction of our lives. This was what ultimately made the difference for me. I just didn’t quite understand the mechanics of it all these years.  Now I understand that I got to where I wanted to go not by thinking of where I didn’t want to be but by thinking of my exact current destination.